My process probably wasn’t much different than anyone else’s. Maybe you get what you give during a coaching period, meaning it doesn’t really matter how much time you spend, you will still get answers out of it. As I’m in-between assignments right now, I gave it all. And boy what a ride I got.

I started out with high energy in February. I met with Linnea in a Zoom meeting for 45 minutes. Within those 45 minutes she had led me to at least two insights and in addition I had some homework to do. This homework approach fit me perfectly. With that I had a task I could deliver to in-between our meetings even if the the homework was more a way for me to reflect and keep the process going.

Besides the thoughts I had (which I collected in a document) I got so many ideas for projects I could do. Two weeks after our first meeting I felt the urge to share my findings and was also looking for more homework. Like a good little girl. Linnea told me to rest.

Rest, I almost go offended. I’m a big (good) girl, I know when I need to rest.

In March we had our second meeting. My energy was still high and more homework and insights followed. It was a constant flow of thoughts, insights and new project ideas. I wrote them all down. I was high, high on life. After our third meeting in April I was still in pursuit of more knowledge and alternative ways to see myself and the world I’m part of. I read Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert and I feel straight into a big, black hole. Drained, confused, lost and couldn’t find a way out into the magical energy I felt in the beginning of the process. Even if I knew that this is part of the process, part of the development journey, I was in despair. But there she was, my coach, who could guide me back. Slowly but surely.

For our fourth meeting in May, I had doubts that I/we would be able to gather things to actually progress. But I did. I wasn’t on the high as in the beginning, I was more grounded and clear what I wanted. I was not all over the place.

I still have one Zoom meeting left, and during the summer I will do my last “homework”. I feel done with the coaching as such as there has been “enough” of epiphanies, now I’m just going to let them marinate in me, so they become part of me.

I’m happy I reached out and got the opportunity to do this now, when I had so much time at my disposal. I needed it. I needed to deep dive and I needed the time to welter in my own thoughts. The process has been like a rollercoaster ride, where I at time was stuck in a loop.

Photo credit: Jack O’Rourke – Unsplash