I wonder why my motivation for work is low? I don't like low motivation and I don't like not doing good job (believe me I have VERY recent experiences from this). Maybe that is what deteriorates my motivation. I am not known for hanging with my head if I do something bad (read less good). I do take it seriously and try my outmost to never repeat the same misstake again, but I don't get suicidal if I do mess up. So, when you are low at work I have a tendency to look the other way which in my case is my darlings. My three musketeers (OK four if you count the dog), they really make my world go 'round. What if I didn't have them and had a blue period at work.. what if my work was my whole identity. Maybe you don't make misstakes then…

And for some reason when thinking of these people I usually think of what they miss by (usually) not having a children. Yes, I know, it is very politically incorrect to even think that children is the center of the world and meaning of life. Children are a free choice (I totally agree) and a life is not less worth if you don't have any (I totally agree), but the thing is, you can never miss what you haven't had. Getting children, in what ever way, adds a dimension to your life that you can't even imagine. You can understand it theoretically but there is not a chance in you-know-where that a person without children can emotionally understand what they do to you. Nor can they grasp how they changes they way you look on life forever.

I heard on the radio a couple of weeks back three people getting pissed on parents for talking about and with their children in a certain way. To an extent I can agree, even though you are a parent aroused with the feelings you have with your newborn you must reflect and adjust your conversation to who you are talking to, that is just common sense and social code of conduct. BUT hey, they have gotten their world rocked big time. A rock you have not experienced if you don't have children and, as a said before, a rock you are totally emotionally incapable of understanding until you have one your self.

As a last example I will tell you about the soon to be dad that I met in a bar while pregnant (very pregnant with Fabian I was not drinking) who was so interested in my belly and proudly announced that he was having a little girl in a couple of months. I wonder, if he ever after holding his daughter in his arms will take the same photos of a very sweet and good looking 18 year old's ass as he did that night. I wish I hade my sharp tounge with me to tell him: "Oh that is wonderful. Do you know what, time flies, soon 40 something men will take pictures of her little sweet ass."

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